Project Jen

2009-06-10T05:04:00.000-07:00

Whew, it's been a while! But I'm glad to say that I am back at WW and actually enjoying it. HOORAY! I thought I'd never get there in my head.

I finally got to that magical place where I felt motivated. Although, I have to admit I am more easily distracted that when I first did WW and it doesn't take much to almost derail my efforts and get me off track. But I have done well so far.

I've been back for about 3 weeks. I went back to my meeting, trying a morning meeting instead of the evening one (it works better for me!) on 19 May and weighed 10st7lb (147lb) - yikes, that's 1lb over my original goal weight! That's 1lb over my healthy range! It totally freaked me out and that was it, I was back in the game.

In the first week I lost 3.5lb!! I was totally over the moon, especially since I'd been a bit naughty on the weekend and hadn't been sure I'd lose.

The second week I was also a bit naughty on the weekend and stayed the same that week - I was glad of it and glad I hadn't gained!

And then the third week I lost 2lb. I was so thrilled. I'd not felt as if I'd lost that week so it was a nice surprise.

I also mentioned to my leader, Lesley, that I was due my second gold star for my keyring - actually I was due it in March - for staying within my goal weight for a second year running. She made me stand up in front of the meeting, congratulated me and gave me the star, asked me to tell everyone my story and how I'd accomplished it, etc.

It was a really good experience for me. Since losing weight down to 9st5lb I have only been watching my weight go up a bit, then get it back down a bit, then putting a bit more on, fretting about the junk I was eating, trying to get motivated, etc. But you know what? I lost enough weight to get into a healthy range and have kept enough off to stay in my healthy range for two years. It was time I owned it and gave myself credit for it. So I really enjoyed that feeling of success and accomplishment.

This week I am feeling very motivated and on-track. Grant is working this weekend which will make it easier for me to stay on track! I find it's when he's off and we go and about and do stuff that I end up eating badly.

I have also found that if I stay off bread and rolls I am waaaaay less tired and don't have that desperate "I neeeed a nap" thing in the afternoon. Hmmmmm. I was always one of those people who said, "I could never give up bread," but I'm finding it quite easy, to be honest. It got to the point where any refined carbs such as bread, cake, cookies just make me feel like crap when I ate them - completely lethargic, irritible and tired. So much so that I don't even want them now, and when I do, I'll have a little in the evening because I'm going to bed soon anyway. It's working for me.

So here's to new beginnings and fresh starts! I'm now aiming to get down to around 9st (126lb) and see how I feel, how I look and how much hard work it is to maintain it. If it's a pain to stick to that weight I'm not going to force myself to - life is about more than being thin. It's also about birthday cake, eating out with friends and family, little treats and delicious new recipes and I have to have room in my life for those things.

2008-11-03T12:50:00.001-08:00

I'm still around! Have been working on the balance thing and still struggling with SAD. Am getting there in my head with regards to exercise - you know how you have to reach that point mentally? Eating ... not too bad although had two very naughty days on Friday and Saturday. I just feel cruddy for it, so it's not tempting to repeat. My oven has packed up, so no baking for now.

One day at a time.

2008-10-27T15:04:00.001-07:00

Okay, still not counting points or food journaling but making much better choices. Trying to find that balance that I can live with right now.

2008-10-26T12:15:00.000-07:00

I had a chat with my friend Rebecca, who is a WW leader. I laid it all out on her (whinge, whinge) about how I'm struggling, why I'm struggling, etc and asked what she'd advise. She suggested I take a break from counting points and doing WW for a bit and one of two things would happen: either the weight I'd gain during that time would shock me into action and I'd be motivated again, or I would realise I'm just not ready to lose or follow the WW plan right now.

So I took a break. It's only been 5 days and you know what? It has really helped. I have realised that I am ready. I do feel better when eating right. I do want it badly enough. I am ready to stop gaining. I'm ready to accept that it's not always easy, but it is always worth it.

That's progress!

I have been finding it hard to be on low points. I am supposed to be on 18 points and have been cruising along just below that. Why? Because I hoard my points because I feel like I'm going to run out and not have enough to account for my evening snacking. And then, come evening, I have all these points left over so I eat them, just because I can. And then I go to bed. Not good.

So I'm going to try what my friend Rachel does: she starts her points right before supper instead of each morning. Then she has her supper, eats whatever snacks she needs to (not eating just because she can) and finds it easier to pull back on breakfast or lunch if she needs to. So that's what I'm going to try, to see if it works out a bit better.

I'm also not going to be so rigid about not going over 18 points. I'd rather eat 20, 21, even 22 healthy points in a day and take a little longer to lose the extra pounds than cave again because "it's too hard".

I'm on the fence about whether I want to go and weigh in on Tuesday. Grant was remarking that he can definitely see that I've lost, no matter what the scale said last time, and I can feel I have lost. My period is over so no more water retention. BUT I've been naughty this weekend and will probably see that on the scale and I'm in a good place mentally and don't want to set myself back with a bad weigh-in (again).

I think I'm going to skip it and go next week.

So I'm going to start my points before dinner tomorrow night and go from there. My only worry this week is that we have friends coming to stay the night on Friday and although I'll be cooking we have to factor in some treats, right? Well, we do, that's how it's done in my world lol. And then on Saturday we'll be having Chinese with Rebecca and her family. Sure, I can and will make healthy choices but I won't be denying myself of everything, as what's the point? So we'll see how that goes and how it affects next week's weigh in.

I need to accept that it's okay to just maintain right now and tackle the weight loss goal in the new year, if that's what needs to happen. I need to adjust my expectations so that any loss is a bonus, but maintaining is my goal. I'll work on that.

2008-10-24T01:33:00.000-07:00

I'm struggling so badly with SAD right now. I feel so fed up and down and light therapy doesn't seem to be helping much. I just kind of crashed yesterday and am taking a break from point counting for a week. It just feels like, why bother? I'm feeling like crap physically, I'm not losing weight, I'm struggling with it and it's more effort than I can expend right now. I'll see how I feel next week.

2008-10-21T14:18:00.000-07:00

Tonight was weigh-in night at WW. Again, I was very curious to see what I'd lost as I had been eating 16-18 points all week except my birthday, when I went way over and didn't count. I'm supposed to be on 18 points so by keeping to 18 points for one day then 16-17.5 the rest of the days was supposed to make up for the one day of going over.

I was quite fed-up to find I'd stayed the same. Ugh.

I had a chat with my leader about why I still want to lose and she is supportive of it. She said I just need to exercise, which I know ... ugh, I am in such rebelious phase about it. I SO don't feel like it even though I know it will help with weight loss as well as SAD.

Anyway, working it out, there are a number of reasons why I haven't lost. It could be one, a few or all of these reasons:

1) I always put on weight at this time of year. Always.

2) Even though I pointed it in, I know homemade bread is supposedly evil for weight loss. I usually eat Weight Watchers or Danish bread which is light - homemade bread, not so much. I have WW scales so made sure to weigh the bread I ate and point it, but still.

3) I am due on my period and am retaining water.

4) Even though I kept to my points I snacked late at night almost every night, having something quite soon before I went to bed. Basically I spent most of my points from dinnertime onwards.

5) The Italian meal I had for my birthday must have been like a million points.

6) No exercise or even basic active lifestyle. Been v sedentery.

I just felt really fed-up about it (although not as much as I did last week, go figure!) I just feel like it is hard work and requires discipline and juggling to stick to 18 points - I don't want to have to stay on 18 points for the rest of my life just to maintain!! I'm just going to have to force myself to exercise.

Actually, having accepted that, I do feel more motivated about it ... now to use that to put myself into action.

OH and I learnt something else tonight: what I thought was a portion of fruit / veg is totally not a portion, it's more like 2 or 3 sometimes. So when I've been writing that I've eaten 5 portions of fruit / veg, it's usually more like 6-10!!!! Mad.

So - official WW weight: still 9st11.5lb (137.5lb)

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
big bowl butternut soup - 0
homemade bread - 1

Afternoon snack
apple - 0.5

Supper
roast chicken, skin removed (leg and thigh) - 4
baked new potatoes - 1
green beans steamed in chicken stock with onion and pepper - 0
steamed carrot and broccoli - 0
gravy - 1.5

Evening snack
WW choc eclair - 1.5
Go Ahead fruit bake - 2

TOTAL POINTS: 15
WATER: 1 glasses (hey, I was getting weighed!!)
FRUIT & VEG: 8 portions (insane!)
MOVEMENT: minimal

Notes: I found myself in a totally baffling position tonight - I was full up, ready for bed and hadn't eaten 16 points like I'm supposed to. I was totally befuddled by this as I've never experienced it before!! I have read or heard of other people moaning about how they struggle to eat all of their points in a day and I've always kind of mentally rolled my eyes and thought, "Gee, give me your problems!" But now I know how it feels.

I am supposed to be on 18 points and a brownie would take care of those last 3 points (I have some in the freezer) but I actually didn't want one!! I was like, "What have I become?!"

So tonight I am going to just accept that I've eaten plenty today, and at 8 portions I'm sure that vegetables, although 0 points, do eventually become points if you eat enough, right? Besides, I'm going out to eat tomorrow night and may or may not make the best choices (I'm being realistic, okay?) so I'd rather save the points than force myself to eat when I don't want to - which is what I'm trying to overcome anyway.

But man, it's weird to sit here with a fully belly and write 15 points as my total for the day. Weird.

2008-10-20T14:11:00.001-07:00

Breakfast
oats porridge - 2
skim milk - 0.5
sugar - 0.5

Lunch
big bowl vegetable soup - 0
butter beans (added to soup) - 0.5
homemade bread - 1

Supper
WW spaghetti carbonara - 7
steamed carrot, cabbage, green beans - 0

Evening snack
apple - 0.5
Cadbury's Highlights Nibbles - 1.5
half slice homemade bread, toasted - 1
peanut butter - 1.5

TOTAL POINTS: 16
WATER: 6 glasses (yay me!)
FRUIT & VEG: 4 portions
MOVEMENT: minimal

Notes: I really tried hard with the water today and did really well! I am comfortable with 5 glasses normally so 6 is great for me.

2008-10-19T13:46:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Mid morning snack
Alpen bar - 1

Lunch
big bowl vegetable soup - 0
butter beans (added to soup) - 0.5
homemade bread - 1.5

Supper
pasta - 3
pesto - 2
grated cheese - 1
steamed carrot, cabbage, green beans - 0

Dessert
WW choc eclair - 1.5

Evening snack
apple - 0.5
half slice homemade bread, toasted - 1
peanut butter - 1.5

TOTAL POINTS: 17
WATER: 3.5 glasses (sigh)
FRUIT & VEG: 5-6 portions (yay me!)
MOVEMENT: minimal

Notes: I'm really struggling to drink more water - I think because the weather is cold. I think I've done very well eating-wise this week; can't wait to see what tomorrow's weigh-in shows. Although, am still retaining water (pms) which doesn't help.

2008-10-18T14:47:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
2 slices Danish wholewheat toast - 1.5
low fat mayo - 0.5
cheddar cheese - 1
sliced tomato and cucumber - 0

Afternoon snack
apple - 0.5

Supper
spaghetti - 3
bolognese sauce - 2
grated cheese - 1

Evening snack
apple - 0.5
NikNaks - 2.5
half slice homemade bread, toasted - 1
Laughing Cow low fat cheese triangle - 0.5

TOTAL POINTS: 17.5
WATER: 3 glasses (must do better!)
FRUIT & VEG: 5 portions (yay me!)
MOVEMENT: minimal

Notes: SAD lamp made a big difference again today. I should have gone to bed earlier instead of snacking, but was listening to the conference talks. Why did I have the NikNaks?? Just because I could, quite honestly. They weren't even all that great. Idiot.

2008-10-17T13:46:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
half a sweet potato, nuked - 2
sauteed mushrooms - 0
1 slice Danish wholewheat toast - 0.5
Laughing Cow light cheese triangle - 0.5

Afternoon snack
apple - 0.5

Supper
WW hearty lamb stew - 4.5

Evening snack
grapes - 0.5
WW ginger pudding - 2.5
low fat custard - 1.5

TOTAL POINTS: 16
WATER: 3.5 glasses (must do better!)
FRUIT & VEG: 5 portions (yay me!)
MOVEMENT: minimal, just the usual walking to school and back 3 times. Oh, and to the end of the road and back for a haircut

Notes: I used my SAD lamp this morning and it made a difference. I had a little more energy and was less hungry. I am loving my new system of cooking: I cook Weight Watchers meals out of the many WW cookbooks I have (I bought 2 from my meetings, the rest I got on eBay). Each recipe makes 4 portions. I eat one, Grant eats one, the boys share one and I freeze the last one. Grant has been on late shifts this week, which means he's not home for supper. I feed the boys something like fish fingers, oven chips and baked beans and I have a choice of WW (homemade) ready meals from out the freezer. It's great!

2008-10-16T13:33:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
spaghetti - 2
roasted vegetable sauce - 0.5
vanilla low fat yoghurt - 1.5

Afternoon snack
2 clementines - 0.5
small bowl of pickled beets - 0

Supper
WW tuna and wild rice bake - 6

Evening snack
tropical fruit smoothie - 1.5
2 slices Danish wholewheat toast - 1.5
2 Laughing Cow low fat cheese triangles - 1

TOTAL POINTS: 18
WATER: 4 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 6 portions (YAY me!)
MOVEMENT: walked to school and back 3 times; did a little yoga

Notes: I have brought my SAD light up out of the cellar as I can really feel I need it. With the change of season I am so tired and hungry and moody and sad. Here's hoping it will help. My body really felt better with the yoga, even though I didn't complete the whole hour and was interrupted twice by the kids.

2008-10-15T15:07:00.000-07:00

Today is my birthday and I decided that I would have a noc-count day as a treat.

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk

Lunch
tortelloni alla panna at Mamma's Too restaurant
a couple of deep-fried battered mushrooms with a smear of garlic sauce
a little salad
half a slice of black forest gateau

Supper
leftover tortelloni

Evening snack
2 brownies

TOTAL POINTS: ??
WATER: 2 glasses (bad!)
FRUIT & VEG: 2 portions
MOVEMENT: does napping count?

Notes: Better mood today and have put the whole points / weight thing into better perspective. Back to counting points tomorrow.

2008-10-14T14:16:00.000-07:00

Tonight was weigh-in night at WW. I was quite excited to go and see how I'd done this week. I've been feeling SO fed-up and miserable and felt like a decent loss at WW would be the little boost I needed to keep going with point counting as I've found it hard this week.

Well, I only lost a pound and you would have sworn I'd gained it by how I felt. So fed-up! I really was. I guess for two reasons: 1) each time I've started WW (twice before) I had a really good loss the first week (4lb and 3.5lb respectively) and 2) when I was on WW the first six months (until I stopped) I lost an average of 2lb a week.

I have been so disciplined this last week, even though I found it quite hard and tedious, so to "only" have lost a pound really got me down.

But, WHAT?! Get over it! That's like a whole brick of margarine that I've shed from my body. I've lost one-sixth of the weight I had gained since February. I'm one pound closer to where I want to be, which isn't even that far away. I need to get over myself and keep on trucking, I know. It's just hard when it's been a crappy day mood-wise and I was so counting on a boost this evening, rather than keeping the bigger picture in focus.

Grant says that he can already see that I've lost weight. I know little things like what I've eaten or drunk during the day can affect the weigh-in, as can where I am in my cycle (retaining water, as evidenced by my sore boobs!) and I really need to take back the power that I've given to that stupid number on the scale.

So - official WW weight: 9st11.5lb (137.5lb)

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
pasta - 2
roasted veg sauce - 0.5

Afternoon snack
chocolate - 0.5
cereal bar - 2

Supper
pasta bake - 7

Evening snack
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

TOTAL POINTS: 19
WATER: 2 glasses (bad!)
FRUIT & VEG: 2 portions
MOVEMENT: does napping count?

Notes: So miserable and moody today. Ugh.

2008-10-13T14:22:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
2 slices Danish toast - 1.5
baked beans - 2

Supper
McDonald's chicken salad deli sandwich (no cheese) - 5.5
side salad - 0
dressing - 1

Evening snack
WW sticky chicken stir-fried with brown rice and soy sauce and shared with Grant - 2
Cadbury's Highlights nibbles - 1.5
one bite of brownie - 1

TOTAL POINTS: 18
WATER: 3 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 3 portions
MOVEMENT: walked to school and back three times, walked into town and back

Notes: We took the boys to McDonald's to celebrate Daniel learning to ride his bike. Originally I had planned on eating at home before we went and then just having a little treat there, but we ended up going early and I was starving. I ordered the chicken deli sandwich on brown, I ordered it as a meal with a salad and water instead of fries and a drink - how disciplined was that?! But even though it's supposedly a healthy option, it's still fast food and I felt it afterward. By the time we came home I was craving junk and really wanted something sweet. I resisted though!

I'm just forging ahead with my goal, I want to lose about a stone (14lb) by Christmas, then I can go onto maintenance points and actually be able to enjoy more treats over Christmas time without "blowing it". I know myself well enough that I know I'll indulge a little more than I should, but I'm okay with that so long as it's conscious decisions and not mindless eating. And if I gain a little, well it will come off in the new year. It's all about balance and staying in control.

For now, though, I'm kind of bored of counting points already. Grant is impressed with how disciplined I've been but it's only because I am determined to get to my goal quicker so that I can increase my points. That's why I never did the proper maintenance routine last time: I was bored of counting points, bored of following WW. I still need to fully accept that it's a necessary tool for me to stay in control long term.

One day at a time.

I do feel like I've lost this week; we'll see tomorrow evening. The next day is my birthday and Grant and I are going out to lunch for delicious Italian (sod the healthy choice for one meal - well, two if you count the leftovers I'll have for supper!) and I may even indulge in a brownie or two. Then it's back on track the next morning.

Conscious choices and balance. I'm learning.

2008-10-12T16:18:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
leftover roast pork - 1.5
2 slices Danish toast - 1.5
Spur sauce - 1

Afternoon snack
apple - 0.5
Alpen cereal bar - 1

Supper
2 low fat sausages - 2
steamed potatoes - 1
low fat mayo - 1
salad - 0

Dessert
WW ginger pud - 2.5
low fat custard - 1.5

Evening snack
apple - 0.5
1 slice Danish toast - 0.5
Laughing Cow extra light cheese triangle - 0.5

TOTAL POINTS: 18.5
WATER: 3 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 3 portions
MOVEMENT: minimal

2008-10-11T14:41:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
leftover roast pork - 1.5
2 slices Danish toast - 1.5
Spur sauce - 1.5

Afternoon snack
apple - 0.5
Alpen cereal bar - 1

Supper
WW smoked mackerel hotpots - 7.5
1 slice Danish toast - 0.5
steamed carrots - 0

Evening snack
homemade chocolate brownie - 3
apple - 0.5
1 slice Danish toast - 0.5
Laughing Cow extra light cheese triangle - 0.5

TOTAL POINTS: 22
WATER: 4 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 4 portions
MOVEMENT: minimal

Emotions: So much better today.

Other notes: I made pancakes today and froze them (well, those that the boys and Grant didn't eat) and I didn't even eat one. I also made flapjacks for Daniel, but I wasn't tempted as I don't really care for them. However, I do adore the chocolate brownies I made but after calculating the points for the whole recipe (70.5!!!) I cut them into 24 little brownies of 3 points each and I only had one. I sent half of them to work with Grant and froze the rest. I was sorely tempted to eat more than one but overcame temptation, so yay me!

2008-10-10T14:47:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
gnocchi - 2
homemade tomato sauce - 0
grated cheese - 1
big bowl of mashed butternut - 0

Afternoon snack
apple - 0.5

Supper
WW sticky chicken - 2.5
white rice - 3
steamed broccoli - 0

Evening snack
chocolate - 3.5
1 slice Danish toast - 0.5
Laughing Cow extra light cheese triangle - 0.5

TOTAL POINTS: 17
WATER: 5 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 5 portions (yay me!)
MOVEMENT: walked to school and back once; some housework

Emotions: Oh my gosh, SO up and down. Had some issues with Grant that I need to work through. The children upset me at supper time and I ended the day alone and in tears. The chocolate was much needed! But it was a decision to treat myself, not a response to a craving. It's not even hormones either. Ugh. Tomorrow is a new day.

Other notes: I find that 5 glasses of water is about my limit; I struggle to drink more than that. I'm happy with that. I feel like I have enough during the day.

2008-10-09T13:29:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
2 slices Danish toast - 1.5
baked beans - 2

Afternoon snack
vegetable soup - 0
2 freshly baked jam cakes - 3
apple - 0.5

Supper
WW traditional roast pork - 4
butternut mash, cauliflower - 0
peas - 0.5
gravy - 1

Evening snack
apple - 0.5
2 slices Danish toast - 1.5
2 tsp butter - 2
strawberry jam - 0.5

TOTAL POINTS: 20.5
WATER: 4 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 6 portions (YAY me!)
MOVEMENT: walked to school and back three times; long walk around town

Emotions: Fairly stable. I only baked because we had 5 open jars of jam in the fridge and I didn't want them to go to waste. The kids have enjoyed the jam cakes (if they hadn't I would haev sent them into work with Grant). This evening I was SO snacky - not even particularly hungry, but my mouth was totally craving something. Eating an apple didn't help so I settled on toast and jam and it did the trick. Have been feeling v tired; going to bed a bit early.

2008-10-08T14:51:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
omelette made with 1 egg and 1 egg white - 1.5
mushrooms - 0
small glass of orange juice - 0.5

Lunch
2 turkey burger patties - 2
2 slices Danish toast - 1.5
ketchup - 0.5

Supper
WW toad in the hole with gravy - 5.5
steamed broccoli, cauliflower, carrots - 0

Dessert
WW strawberry-lime cheesecake - 1

Evening snack
apple, chopped and cooked in microwave - 0.5
caramel fudge sauce - 1
crumbled digestive - 1.5
ice cream - 1.5

TOTAL POINTS: 17
WATER: 5 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 5 portions (yay me!)
MOVEMENT: not much

Emotions: Upbeat. I resisted temptation when we went to Tesco. I did want to mention that the WW cheesecake was home made from a WW recipe and made with sugar free jelly. It was okay - won't make it again - but because I never eat sweetners I really noticed a difference when I had some in the jelly. It made me feel crappy hours later and left a vague taste in my mouth and left me craving something sweet. Totally reinforced my prejudice against sweetners.

2008-10-07T13:34:00.000-07:00

I went to Weight Watchers tonight for the first time since February. I had to start attending meetings again, and tonight was facing the truth and taking it from there. In the last eight months I have gained 6lb. I'm okay with that. Here's to new beginnings!

I was saying to Grant that the last time I did WW it was partly about becoming healthier but mainly about losing weight. This time it's mainly about a long-term healthy lifestyle, but partly about losing weight. I plan to stick with it from now on, although I'm realistic to know that there will be ups and downs along the way.

So - official WW weight: 9st12.5lb (138.5lb)

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
spaghetti, roasted vegetable sauce - 2.5

Afternoon snack
Alpen bar - 1

Supper
takeout pizza - 12

TOTAL POINTS: 19
WATER: 5 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 3 portions
MOVEMENT: walked to school and back three times; some cleaning around the house.

Emotions: Cheerful mood. The pizza for dinner probably wasn't the healthiest choice but it was my treat night and I kept within my points, which I'm pleased about, and it won't be a weekly occurrence. All in all I feel very positive and in control. I'm looking forward to a good week and a good weigh-in next week.

2008-10-06T13:12:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
omelette made with one egg and one egg white - 1.5
heap of sauteed mushrooms - 0
grated cheese - 1

Supper
WW hearty lamb stew - 4.5

Dessert
WW ginger pudding - 3.5
low fat custard - 1.5

TOTAL POINTS: 15.5
WATER: 5 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 3 portions
MOVEMENT: next to nothing - not feeling well, just vegged again

Emotions: For some reason I was really emotional and sad today. Not sure why. Also still feel like I'm fighting a cold (sore throat, aches etc). Supper was really filling so I waited until later to have the ginger pudding that I'd baked. I didn't really even want it because I was still satisfied from supper but ate it anyway - why do I do that?? Just because it's there? It's freezable, so it wasn't like it had to be eaten or go to waste. Ugh. It doesn't matter that I could "afford" it with points, it's about training my body to eat when I'm hungry and not eat when I'm not. Okay, letting go ... learn from my mistakes and don't repeat them, right? I'm trying.

2008-10-05T12:30:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
2oz turkey burger patty - 1
2 slices Danish toast - 1.5
tomato, pickles, etc - 0

Supper
roast potato - 1.5
mashed potato - 1
roast chicken - 2
carrots, Brussels sprouts - 0
gravy - 1
roast parsnips - 0.5
stuffing - 1
cordial - 0.5

Dessert
cheesecake - 8?
birthday cake - 10?

TOTAL POINTS: 31.5
WATER: 5.5 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 2-3 portions
MOVEMENT: next to nothing - not feeling well, just vegged again

Emotions: It was another perfect day for snacking but I actually had none. We had supper at our friends' house. I ate a very reasonable portion, didn't overeat. I did drink the cordial that they'd already poured for me, but that was only half a point. I enjoyed the cheesecake they served for dessert, but didn't have seconds. I did have birthday cake later. It was okay; I really didn't enjoy the thick icing but Paige was so proud of her fancy iced cake and there was no way to discretely leave the icing - I made the choice to eat all of it rather than offend her.

2008-10-04T14:46:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
2 slices Danish toast - 1.5
baked beans - 2
sprinkling of grated parmesan (not even 1g) - 0

Supper
WW tuna and wild rice bake - 6
carrots, green beans - 0
peas, corn - 0.5

Evening snack
apple: peeled, cut up and microwaved - 0.5
digestive biscuit: crumbled over apple - 1
toffee fudge sauce - 1
small scoop ice cream - 1.5

TOTAL POINTS: 17.5
WATER: 3.5 glasses (no excuse really)
FRUIT & VEG: 5 portions (yay!)
MOVEMENT: next to nothing - stayed in all day and vegged

Emotions: It was a perfect day for snacking but I actually had none. Grant was working and the boys and I just hung out all day, doing nothing productive. Weather miserable, windy and rainy. I had breakfast late and then got involved with blogging and playing Wii with the boys so we had lunch late and before I knew it, it was supper time. Made the apple dessert for Grant and I in the evening. All in all a good day; I feel in control. I enjoyed cooking supper. Thought briefly about chocolate but it was such a fleeting craving I paid it no mind.

2008-10-03T12:50:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Morning snack
Alpen cereal bar - 1

Lunch
2oz turkey burger patty - 1
2 slices Danish toast - 1.5
tomato, pickles, etc - 0

Afternoon snack
1 slice toast - 0.5
Laughing Cow extra light triangle cheese - 0.5

Supper
homemade pizza and 1.5 dough balls - 14?
salad dressing to dip - 2

Evening snack
Jumping Jack salted popcorn - 0.5

TOTAL POINTS: approx 24.5
WATER: 3.5 glasses (I went out today, so didn't drink as much)
FRUIT & VEG: 2-3 portions
MOVEMENT: 5,060 steps

Emotions: A bit up and down. Noah was a bit stressful today. I had a fairly high point supper but planned for it and chose it - still feeling in control. I did find it pretty tempting to be out shopping this morning - all of the snacks in the shops looked good. I'm fine until I see something, then I crave it. But I bravely resisted! After lunch I felt "snacky" and like I wanted something sweet so I chewed some chewing gum and it worked to satisfy that. Thanks, Di, for the tip! Made pizza for supper but I made sure to roll the crust thin and load up with veges. Watched a movie as a family with popcorn but I didn't have any of theirs - I had a bag of Jumping Jack popcorn which is only half a point.

2008-10-02T12:38:00.000-07:00

Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
pasta - 2
roasted veg sauce - 0.5
grated cheese - 1

Afternoon snack
1 slice toast - 0.5
Laughing Cow extra light triangle cheese - 0.5

Supper
Southwestern turkey burger (split into two) - 2
two small bread rolls - 4
tomatoes, lettuce, pickles - 0
ketchup - 0.5
Spur sauce - 1

Evening snack
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

TOTAL POINTS: 19
WATER: 5.5 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 4 portions
MOVEMENT: 9,700 steps (1 activity point earned)

Emotions: Pretty upbeat today. Kept busy, no stress. No cravings.

2008-10-01T12:29:00.000-07:00

I have sorely neglected this blog. I've not been eating very well and have slipped into old habits. Not dreadful, but certainly not ideal and my jeans are a bit tight and I know I've gained. I think my biggest mistake was simply losing interest once I got to 9st6lb last June ... I never did the maintenance routine as I was tired of tracking and counting points and wanted a break.

Well, I've had my break and have started to track again. I've done really well this week but couldn't go to WW last night as Grant was working. Luckily there is only one week in every five that he's working and I can't go. I'll be going down next week. I'm not sure what I'll weigh on the WW scales in the evening but on my own scales, naked and first thing in the morning I am 9st8lb (134lb).

I have to say that I have been following Roni's blog more closely and she is such an inspiration. I just love how she is so enthusiastic and how she really cares and is passionate about healthy eating, but is totally practical and realistic as well. Anyway, I've been thinking a lot about her approach, about how it's not on plan or off plan, on track or off, it's living life. And you just have to choose how you're going to live it and how you're going to treat the body you have. I think the most influential thing she's said was something like: Every choice is exactly that - a new choice and it has nothing to do with what you had for lunch.

I'm going to try tracking what I eat on here, because that will hopefully keep me posting and accountable rather than only posting on weigh-in day - after all, it's the day-to-day decisions that are more important than the weekly weigh-in.

So, today I had (and point value):
Breakfast
50g muesli with skim milk - 3.5

Lunch
spaghetti - 2
roasted veg sauce (I prepared a batch and froze in portions last week) - 0.5
grated cheese - 1

Afternoon snack
1 slice toast - 0.5
Laughing Cow extra light triangle cheese - 0.5

Supper
Grant was at work and I have been craving some kind of apple dessert so I chose to have a low point supper which was basically a repeat of lunch with a little extra veg and protein thrown in - this left me enough points for dessert

pasta - 3
roasted veg sauce - 0.5
extra mushrooms and carrots - 0
leftover low fat sausage - 1.5

Evening snack
apple, cut up and microwaved with a little water to steam it, then drained - 0.5
15g toffee fudge sauce - 1
digestive biscuit, crumbled - 1
tiny scoop vanilla ice cream - 1.5

TOTAL POINTS: 17
WATER: 5 glasses
FRUIT & VEG: 5 portions (yay!)
MOVEMENT: minimal - only walked to school and back three times

Emotions: The weather is frightful at the moment, really windy and cold and I did find myself wanting to bake. When I stopped to think about it, it wasn't that I even wanted to eat anything in particular, I just wanted the cosy homey-ness of baking so I resisted. I knew if I gave in then I would only eat the baked goods even though I didn't specially want them.

If I still feel like baking on Saturday I might make something to take to the Hughes's on Sunday (we're going there for dinner).

2008-02-21T10:55:00.000-08:00

Weigh in day was yesterday and I gained a pound. I'm not surprised. I've been really demotivated this week and have been picking on all sorts and eating chocolate. It doesn't help that I made this and this when we had guests on the weekend. Oh well, we'll see if I can get back into gear this week!

2008-02-14T03:03:00.000-08:00

Okay, so I've been slacking on this blog a bit! I didn't go back to WW until last week, when I went to my new meeting. I really like my leader and I love that I can just walk down to the meeting, but what I loved most is that I only gained another 3lb over Christmas. So, total gain since I reached 9st 6lb in June = 6lb.

So I was back on the wagon last week except for the dinner party we had on Saturday (I didn't count points on the weekend) and I was thrilled to go for weigh in on Tuesday and discover that in the last week I lost 4lb! Yay me!! I still want to lose another 10lb or so and then see from there.

2007-11-29T05:05:00.000-08:00

Weigh-in day was yesterday. I hadn't been to WW in five months! Once I had reached a point where I was happy to maintain for a while I never did follow the WW guidelines to figure out what my maintenance points are. I simply started eating a little more, being more relaxed about snacking, and kept watching the scale. I had planned on pulling back a little if I saw my weight creep back up. I was around 58kg and swore that I wouldn't go over 60.

Slowly over the last few months my eating habits have got worse and worse and I've been eating more and more junk. But my weight has hardly changed! My shape has though. My boobs are smaller and my butt is bigger, and I can swear I've put some more padding on my belly too.

Anyway, I have reached a point where my trousers are getting tight and I am feeling vaguely ashamed of my sloppy eating habits. I want to get back on track because I feel better physically and emotionally when I'm eating right. I also want to lose a little more weight before Christmas and then get right back on track properly once we're a bit settled after our house move in January.

So ... off to WW I went last night.

There is a new leader, but that doesn't faze me (and besides, I'll have a new leader in a new meeting once we move.) I stepped on the scale and was amazed to find that in the last five months, with my steady decline in self-discipline, I've gained ...

... only 3 POUNDS!

Feeling the familiar glow of success that I used to enjoy at the WW meetings, I sat and enjoyed my leader's motivational talk and came home buzzing. I feel so much happier and energised and in control simply by attending my meeting.

So here's to a new start, and continued success.

I've started a new food blog, and since I'm back on the wagon I'll be featuring mainly WW recipes for the next three weeks. Then all bets are off until after Christmas - watch out for delicious cookies, bakes and meals!

2007-06-07T07:09:00.000-07:00

I forgot to post after last week's weigh-in. I lost a pound and a half - Rachel lost 2, so I owe her flowers. I was silly and met Grant for lunch so my loss wasn't that good. Oh well!

I didn't get weighed this week - I've been a bit sloppy with points and ate junk on the weekend a bit, but my scales say I've lost anyway.

Had a great time shopping for jeans at Sainsbury's - all of the size 10's fit me! I just didn't like the style of some of them, and only ended up buying one pair.

2007-05-27T06:23:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in day was a few days ago, I forgot to update this blog. I stayed the same. I was fine with that as I had been a bit sloppy with points last week, plus had been out to lunch with Rebecca and Rachel in the afternoon before I was weighed.

Rachel and I are now both 9 stone 10 and both want to lose about half a stone so we're in hot competition this week. Whoever loses the least has to buy the other some flowers (just from the supermarket). I've been really motivated and have been sticking to my points, in fact I've been under my points every day - not through starving myself but making better choices. I am loving WW, I never have to go hungry or without treats!

I had three people compliment me last Sunday at church and more this week. Am loving my new clothes!

2007-05-17T11:30:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in day and I lost 2 pounds, but that was over the last two weeks as I didn't go and get weighed last week. Am chuffed, because I was messing about and going over my points, so I was glad to have lost.

I've been shopping like a mad woman this last week ... I have bought more clothes in the past week than I have in the past five years, and I'm not exaggerating! It is SO MUCH FUN to be able to buy size 10 and 12 and have them look good! I've bought a dress, skirt, tops, blouses, cardigans, sandals ... way too much fun. I get on such a high, and when something is a real bargain as well I'm like in euphoria, lol! I get way more pleasure from shopping now than I ever did from naughty food, and that's saying something.

2007-05-02T10:39:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in day ... I really didn't think I'd lost this week due to stress so I was pleased that I'd lost 1 pound.

2007-04-27T00:51:00.000-07:00

What's a weight loss diary without 'before' and 'after' pics? Well, these are more like 'before' and 'during' pics as I still want to lose a bit more. Here is what I looked like pre-weight-loss:

And last week at 24.5lb lighter and 2 sizes smaller:

2007-04-27T00:45:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in day was two days ago and I lost another 2.5lb!! I am so excited. It was a thrill to fit comfortably in size 12 ... but now my jeans are getting a little loose again and for the first time the possibility of size 10 has become real. They did have a word with me at WW, asking how much I still want to lose but I assured them that I wanted to remain within the healthy range and not drop below it and that even though I've gone down into the next weight bracket (I'm 9st13 now) I wasn't going to drop a point as I'm doing fine on 19 points a day. I just feel like I still have some flab on my belly and hips (I'm fine with everything else) and that because I have a small frame it doesn't look as good on me to be in the top end of the healthy weight range for my height; I look better towards the bottom end. I wish I could just lose off my belly / hips and leave everything else!

Have been toning my arms with simple exercises every day; we'll see when / if it makes a difference. Ritsuko (one of the moms at school) asked if I'd lost weight, she'd noticed it in my face most. One more pound and it's two stone I've lost!

2007-04-24T15:11:00.000-07:00

Tonight I was photographing Matt and Helen (their engagement session) and we got chatting about ages. I was 19 when I got engaged and had just turned 20 when Grant and I were married; Helen has just turned 20 and I'll be photographing their wedding in July. When I mentioned that I've been married 11 years, Helen blurted out, "Wow, I hope I look as good as you in 11 years' time!"

MADE. MY. DAY.

2007-04-18T14:07:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in day and I was thrilled to bits to find I've lost 3 pounds!! Woohoo! Should go to Spain more often.

Loving my new jeans from Sainsbury's (size 12) - they fit so well and I feel great when I wear them.

2007-04-05T05:18:00.000-07:00

I feel so much better today, things are more in perspective. Feel a bit sheepish, actually, but in a way it's good that gaining a little freaked me out so much - I'm more motivated and more careful with my tracking and points now. I know WW works and I know it's a long-term lifestyle change, not a quick fix or anything to get obsessive about.

Of course, some retail therapy always helps! Today I bought some trousers and skirts and a top - all size 12 with a couple of size 10's thrown in for kicks and giggles, and they all fit beautifully! I'm remembering what it's all about - I'm in a healthy weight range, I look good (or better than I did before) and I feel great, and my clothes fit and that's what it's all about, not a number on a scale. I feel and look like I lost this week, so who cares what the scales say.

Must lose the bit of flab on my belly, hips and bum, but healthily, not obsessively. Am at peace with that half pound, and in a really good place mentally.

2007-04-04T10:49:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in day and I was devastated to be told I'd gained half a pound. I know, talk about over-reacting - to come home and cry over a couple of hundred grams is pathetic, but it was a crappy end to a crappy day. I need to figure out how and why it happened.

When you're on maintenance you can eat around 6 extra points a day and not gain (although everyone does differ) and there is no way I ate that many, no way at all. I did sneak a couple of the boys crisps here and there but even when I do that I mark it on my tracker and I've not gone over any day by more than a couple of points, and that wasn't even every day! We had the Sisters' Meal on Friday and I didn't pig out but I wasn't strict, and ate a whole helping of banoffee pie ... but even then, I had 14.5 points which I'd saved for the meal, plus the theoretical 6 extra when maintaining!

I guess what upset me is being so close to how I want to look, and then having this step backward. I've never not lost, so to gain (let alone stay the same!) was really upsetting. It makes me afraid, I don't want to gain back the weight I lost.

My leader was really nice, she was telling me to just relax, that it might mean nothing, that there may be no reason at all why it's happened, it could be my body adjusting and doing its own thing. She said to just stay calm and see what the next week or two bring - yeah right, I'm off to Spain on Monday, I can just imagine what the next week or two will look like. It's made me feel crappy about the holiday as well, like I can't just enjoy eating out etc. I've been out to eat before and made wise choices and still lost that week, but this half a pound has freaked me out. But I don't want to turn into one of those women who are so boring to eat out with, so strict and obsessed. But I don't want to gain any more either!!

I know I'm overreacting, but I can't help it. I think it's the perfectionist in me: doing WW, must lose every single week. Not realistic, but there it is. My leader was saying that if it's even just a couple of ounces over last week's weight it will count it as half a pound as the scales only measure in half pounds, and it might not even be that much.

I need to just get over it and get real. Maybe I wouldn't be as upset if I hadn't had such a crappy day and pressured week.

2007-03-28T12:14:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in day and I've lost 2.5lb!! I only needed to lose half a pound to make Gold Membership, so I was thrilled!! So now I'm a Gold Member plus I've lost over 10% of my body weight. I am grinning from ear to ear!

Total weight loss: 22lb in 11 weeks.

Popped into Next Clearance today - they have no changing rooms so I had to just buy a few items on faith. The size 12 long denim skirt I got is slightly loose (!!) so I'm taking it back, the size 12 jeans are much too tight in the bum/waist but I'll hang onto them and hopefully fit into them soon, and the size 12 rust cord skirt is a little snug but will fit beautifully in a week or two. CHUFFED TO BITS.

2007-03-21T12:59:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in day and although I hadn't expected to have lost more than half a pound, I actually lost 1.5 lb this week! I am so so so thrilled. This means that I only have to lost HALF A POUND to become a Gold Member and get my 10% keyring!! I'll definitely lose at least half a pound this week.

Why I hadn't expected to lose much: I didn't count points when I ate a big meal for Noah's birthday; I've been picking on birthday cake, chocolate and Rice Krispie treats; went out to eat last night and ate a bit too much.

Why I did lose despite the above: lots of walking; staying roughly near my points even though I did go over; didn't eat all of my potato, the coleslaw or all the cheese in my meal when we ate out.

I am so pleased!

2007-03-14T15:47:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in day and I am walking on air - I lost 3 pounds this week!! I couldn't stop smiling the whole meeting. That means only 2 pounds to go and I will be a Gold Member! I still want to lose another 11 or so after that, though - will see how it goes.

I had been feeling a little discouraged this week because I've been sooo hungry lately but Sue Bentley said the same thing happened to her and that it's just a phase so hang in there. Today was better, I wasn't as hungry.

Rachel came to my WW meeting with me and we walked down. Today in total I've walked 16,059 steps which is 5.58 miles!! I earned 3 points but don't plan on using them. I'd rather lose the weight faster.

Feeling fantastic!! Yesterday I bought a new pair of jeans which fit fantastically. They are a size 14 but they fit properly - this is a big deal for me. The two main motivations to lose weight (besides looks) was that I was tired of being tired all the time (I'm not tired all the time anymore) and I couldn't find jeans or trousers to fit properly (and now I can!). I'm so happy.

2007-03-14T08:07:00.000-07:00

I've done lots of walking today - it's only 2pm and I've already done 10,110 steps, which is 3.51 miles. I've reached healthy and have earned 1 point so far.

The weather is gorgeous, all sunny and fresh so I walked to Gyminies. I let Noah walk halfway home and all the fresh air and exercise has tired him out and he's asleep so i am working. Win-win!

I was reflecting on how much losing weight has changed my life already. Not too long ago I hardly took Noah to playgroups because I was too tired and fed up to bother. Now I go to mothers' group on Mondays, Gyminies on Wednesdays and out with him other days too, and today there was me walking over a mile to Gyminies. I feel so fantastic!

I feel like I've lost this week, hoping it will show on the scales tonight.

2007-03-08T02:50:00.000-08:00

Weigh-in day yesterday - I lost half a pound. Not much of a loss (in fact, it was my lowest yet) but I was still really pleased because on Saturday we went to Sylvia's 60th birthday party and ate there, on Sunday I had some of her birthday cake and on Monday Rachel took us to Pizza Hut for buffet lunch.

I really did try to make better eating choices on these occasions than I normally would have - at Sylvia's do I had saved 6 points and I asked for half the amount of beef stew that the caterer was going to serve (and didn't even finish it), loaded up on green beans, carrots and salad and declined the potatoes and rice (although I did have some cauliflower cheese). I wasn't being pious - I genuinely didn't miss anything I had turned down. For dessert I chose the chocolate cake but only ate half of the piece and didn't have pouring cream over it. The birthday cake the next day: I didn't finish the whole piece and gave the thick rolled icing to the kids. At Pizza Hut I did have 3 pieces of pizza but I filled up on salad and chose a fat-free vinaigrette dressing, and didn't have any of the garlic bread. Again, I was well satisfied and enjoyed the meal and didn't miss anything I didn't eat. So I was really pleased that my choices paid off and I still had a small loss this week.

I feel so fantastic - I have more energy, I can fit into my clothes and look decent in them and I feel more confident.

2007-02-28T10:33:00.000-08:00

Weigh-in day and I am over the moon - I lost 2.5lb! Woohoo!! That makes 14.5lb total - just over a stone. Yeah! Driving home I was on a total high and I was thinking, "This, this feeling, is worth so much more than a piece of chocolate cake or any of the things I've given up (and frankly don't even miss)." Am v proud of myself and still feeling v motivated and focused.

2007-02-27T09:31:00.000-08:00

Did the Kelli Roberts step workout today - first 2 parts with 6 inches and last bit with 4 inches. I quite enjoyed it - it was a tough workout, got me sweating and breathing. Can't make it all the way through the abs bit.

I've been feeling so great. I'm enjoying fitting into smaller clothes, I have more energy, my skin is clear and Rachel can't believe how healthy I look.

2007-02-21T14:12:00.000-08:00

Weigh-in day ... I lost another pound. I was hoping for 1.5 but am still happy. I am looking so much better with the 12lb loss so far and feeling fantastic, so anything more that I lose is gravy. I'm back into the clothes I wore before I fell pregnant with Noah (almost 3 years ago!) although they do fit a bit differently as my shape has changed.

I need to lose 8lb to get to goal at WW, and then I'd like to lose another 15lb after that. I'm aiming for a size 12. So with 23lb to lose and 12lb lost already, I'm a third of the way there!

2007-02-14T12:56:00.000-08:00

Weigh-in day - I lost another 2.5 pounds! I was so so pleased as I hadn't felt like I'd lost anything this week even though I was slightly below my points every day and I've been ill. Total loss in five weeks: 11 pounds.

2007-02-08T04:29:00.000-08:00

Weight-in day was yesterday - I lost another pound. I know why it wasn't more - even though I fasted 3 meals on the weekend, I didn't count points the rest of the time and probably went over. Also, I haven't been drinking enough water. But hey, it's still a pound less than I was before. Here's to a better week next week!

2007-01-31T11:30:00.000-08:00

Weigh-in day - and I've lost another 3.5 pounds! Hooray, that's half a stone in two weeks. Man, I felt crap that first week ... but after the first 7 days my body seemed to adjust and I've felt great. I'm learning how to manage my points throughout the day. I can feel the weight loss, it's showing in how my clothes fit and I can see it in my face / neck / ribcage. Yeah.

2007-01-24T01:19:00.000-08:00

Weigh-in day! I've lost 4 pounds in my first week, hooray!

Have to admit, have felt pretty crap most of the week. Yesterday was the worst. I am trying to spread my points more evenly now and drink more water - I think my body has been detoxing or something. We'll see how it goes next week.

But yay! 4 pounds!

2007-01-22T11:17:00.000-08:00

I started doing WW last week Thursday. I'm not attending meetings or anything, but I have the book and the recipe books and Rebecca is very supportive and thre to help me with advice and to talk about it and she'll be checking up on my weight every Wednesday. I'm enjoying it so far - appeals to the control freak in me! The recipes are really good. I'm a bit annoyed that I'm only allowed 19 points a day, but so far I'm managing to make them work.

Oh, I forgot to mention I've hurt my knee (sitting with my leg twisted under me while at the computer) so that's why I've stopped exercising for now. I plan to lift weights though.

Starting weight last Thursday: 11st 7lb.

2007-01-10T06:48:00.000-08:00

Exercise: yesterday instead of driving to fetch Daniel from school I walked, pushing the buggy. Over 2 miles round trip.
Other: bought a pair of shoes and a skirt.

2007-01-08T12:51:00.000-08:00

Weight: don't know what it is now, but a few days ago it was 72.2kg - 13.2kg to go (0.8kg lost). When I shot the wedding with Natasha on Saturday she commented that I had lost weight (so have a couple of other people).
Water: appalling ... must get on track!
Eating: still can't taste anything due to bad sinus infection. I'm well now, but apparently it can take months for nerves to renew?! Tonight Noah was hassling at bedtime and I had the strongest craving for pudding / cake / custard / ice cream - purely emotional eating which I resisted. For meals I've been eating Weight Watchers meals some of the time.
Exercise: tonight, even though I was shattered, I did 2.3 miles on the treadmill while watching CSI (40 minutes). I feel really proud of myself. I mainly walked, but ran for a couple of minutes a couple of times.
Other: bought my hair straighteners! Need to get a haircut, must book that.

2006-12-30T11:22:00.000-08:00

Water: Have been doing really badly. I'm feeling it too, especially now I am sick (just getting over cold, struggling with sinus infection).
Weight: Just before Christmas I was 71.3kg (11st3lb / 157lb) - 12.3kg to go ... I had lost 1.6kg. What with all the bingeing on junk food over Christmas I have no idea what I weigh now. I'll get back on track in the New Year and once I am over this illness.
Eating: Lots of chocolate and desserts, nuts, junk food, etc. I really have been eating whatever I want, whenever I want. A lot of it is comfort eating as Noah has been really sick and whiny and I've been ill too.
Exercise: Absolutely none. Unless you count napping.

2006-12-18T13:53:00.000-08:00

Water: Did badly yesterday and badly today. I don't do well when I'm out and about ... I hate to have to run to the loo every five minutes when I'm not home.
Eating: Doing okay, but starting to slip a little with the prospect of Christmas. It doesn't help to have junk in the house. My meals are better than they used to be, but it's the snacking (esp in evening) that's getting me.
Exercise: Did 2.3 miles in 40 minutes, walking on treadmill.

2006-12-15T02:46:00.000-08:00

Yesterday - 14 December

Weight: 72.4kg (11st5lb / 159lb) - 13.4kg to go, 0.5kg lost
Water: 2 litres drunk
Eating: not bad, resisted temptation to eat crap and had healthy snacks instead, Weight Watchers meals for lunch and supper (home-cooked, and I cooked extra for the freezer)
Exercise: walked / ran 1.75 miles in 25 minutes on the treadmill

2006-12-13T15:21:00.000-08:00

Water: 1.75 litres drunk - didn't make the full 2 litres because I was out quite a bit today
Eating: not bad - was very restrained at a Christmas get-together and only had little nibbles instead of going all out

2006-12-12T11:39:00.000-08:00

Weight: 72.9kg (11st6lb / 160lb) - 13.9kg to go
Water: 2 litres drunk
Eating: not bad
Exercise: cheesy step workout, 6 inch step. Did great - felt my muscles burning while I worked out but managed to keep up and keep in control the whole way. I still remember the whole routine. My knees hurt a bit during but by the end they were okay. I had to lower my arms briefly at one point when working on them as they got too tired, but it wasn't for long. Stretching - am still as flexible as I always was.

A new beginning

2006-12-12T09:07:00.000-08:00

Project Jen begins today. Maybe December isn't the wisest time to begin, but I'll allow myself a slow start as I enjoy some indulgence over the Christmas season, then step it up a bit in the new year.

What is Project Jen? It's a makeover project. It's me reaching a point where I'm tired of looking frumpy and scruffy and unkempt. I'm done childbearing and now I'm reclaiming my body and fine tuning it. My goals include:

- losing 14kg (2st3lb / 31lb) and fitting into a size 12
- focusing on better grooming, including gel nails, using a hair straightener and taking more care with my make-up
- trendier clothes
- drinking 2 litres of water a day
- taking care to eat a little better / less

I certainly don't expect any of this to happen overnight and I know I'll have plenty of "why bother?" days, which is one of the reasons I've started this blog - to keep track of my progress and motivate myself a little. I'll also be posting progress pictures and I am to report my weight to Rebecca every Wednesday (that's the day she goes to Weight Watchers).

Grant and I have worked out a new routine - he will watch the boys upstairs immediately after he gets home from work on Tuesdays and Fridays and I will do a step workout. Before getting pregnant with Daniel I was doing a step workout 2-3 times a week and lost 11kg (1st10lb / 24lb) in three months.

Why am I suddenly motivated to do this? I have reached a point where I am just tired all the time because I'm unfit. My clothes don't fit me because I'm between sizes, and those that do fit don't look good because I'm overweight. I'm fed up of the "muffin top" (the bulge above my waistband) and my big bum. My body finally feels like it's back to "normal" (ha!) after having Noah and I just feel like my efforts at losing weight by exercising will pay off. I've done it before and I know I can do it again. Because I've done it before I know that it takes discipline and motivation.

So here's to new beginnings and goals and honing my bod!